I'm an adopted child. My upbringing was good, full of money and every thing I needed - except real love. My adopted mother was very possessive and tried to make me into a person I wasn't - she tried to make me like she is - and everything within me cried against it.

Well, good news is - I found my biological mother in May 1998 and we are so happy. We love each other so much, also her husband and my two half sisters and my little half brother. We are like a family that was never apart.

But it's hard for my mother to understand me, to see the pain I still have - so I wrote this to explain to her how I felt and what she must do when she doesn't understand my feelings and my moods!

I lost my very dear friend. She was (and still is) very special, because she is the one who taught me what it's like to be myself, she helped me discover myself.

She told me that there is no sin in being yourself and loving yourself. She also told me of God and the Love He has for me. She opened myself to myself - she was always there, helping and caring when I was going through this difficult process. And now - we don't even see each other any more and if we see each other in the street - we great like strangers!

I did not lose her by my own 'mistake', but by the wickedness of someone else - my mother who is very possessive of me. It is always bad to loose something that is so precious, especially when they are still there.